I think one of the toughest jobs in being a parent is "knowing when to hold them, knowing when to fold them." So many battles to be fought...it's tough to be consistent, fight the right battles, and know when to just let things go.
BATTLE OF WILLS
I was the smartest of parents . . . until I became a parent. Little Miss Jenna and I have really enjoyed our "alone" time this past week when the boys go to work/school. She's a much different child when she's alone. Quite pleasant in fact. However, we still have our share of opposing opinions.
For example, she loves pink and purple (which I admit, I have grown to like since I was pregnant with her). Her favorite thing to wear is her purple plaid skirt or anything pink. The skirt is a bit too cold for winter, but we've compromised with tights (she prefers the polka dot ones). She gets upset when her skirt is in the laundry (and sometimes it stays there awhile...just for my sanity). It finally occurred to me that she really likes wearing skirts in general. She feels "beautiful" and they "twirl so beautifully." I pulled out a pink skort from summer, put on tights, and she went to town with the pink. Here is what she "invented" herself. Think Pink. Then she told me that she wanted to "go out in pink style." I asked what that meant. She replied, "It means you go somewhere and you are dressed beautiful." She put my black bracelets on me and announced I was now "pink style" (read: beautiful to go outside).
Other example: We were coloring the other day. She had gotten a new set of chunky crayons for Christmas. (OK, I'm a sucker for new crayons...all clean, crisp with a sharp tip and a firm crayola wrapper...ah, happiness to my soul. I know...silly, but true. I've always been this way with markers and crayons.) Jenna, however, prefers her crayons to be "smooth and soft." Meaning, she intends to peel every ounce of wrapper OFF of her crayons. Despite my valiant efforts, I could not pursuade her to "see the light" (my way, of course). I finally humbled myself enough to admit, "They are her crayons. You fight many battles. Is this one you really need to fight? Let it go. You can go color with YOUR crayons." For a full hour, she proceeded to rid each and every crayon of it's wrapper. She felt joy inside. She didn't care about identifying the color of the crayon ("You just color with it to figure it out."). She only cared about smooth and soft. (Slimy, if you ask me!) To each their own.
BATTLE OF WILLS
I was the smartest of parents . . . until I became a parent. Little Miss Jenna and I have really enjoyed our "alone" time this past week when the boys go to work/school. She's a much different child when she's alone. Quite pleasant in fact. However, we still have our share of opposing opinions.
For example, she loves pink and purple (which I admit, I have grown to like since I was pregnant with her). Her favorite thing to wear is her purple plaid skirt or anything pink. The skirt is a bit too cold for winter, but we've compromised with tights (she prefers the polka dot ones). She gets upset when her skirt is in the laundry (and sometimes it stays there awhile...just for my sanity). It finally occurred to me that she really likes wearing skirts in general. She feels "beautiful" and they "twirl so beautifully." I pulled out a pink skort from summer, put on tights, and she went to town with the pink. Here is what she "invented" herself. Think Pink. Then she told me that she wanted to "go out in pink style." I asked what that meant. She replied, "It means you go somewhere and you are dressed beautiful." She put my black bracelets on me and announced I was now "pink style" (read: beautiful to go outside).
Other example: We were coloring the other day. She had gotten a new set of chunky crayons for Christmas. (OK, I'm a sucker for new crayons...all clean, crisp with a sharp tip and a firm crayola wrapper...ah, happiness to my soul. I know...silly, but true. I've always been this way with markers and crayons.) Jenna, however, prefers her crayons to be "smooth and soft." Meaning, she intends to peel every ounce of wrapper OFF of her crayons. Despite my valiant efforts, I could not pursuade her to "see the light" (my way, of course). I finally humbled myself enough to admit, "They are her crayons. You fight many battles. Is this one you really need to fight? Let it go. You can go color with YOUR crayons." For a full hour, she proceeded to rid each and every crayon of it's wrapper. She felt joy inside. She didn't care about identifying the color of the crayon ("You just color with it to figure it out."). She only cared about smooth and soft. (Slimy, if you ask me!) To each their own.
2 comments:
It's stuff that requires letting go of the mommy control (just like the things you mentioned) that is the hardest for me! Props to you for letting Jenna be herself!
Oh you are so amusing. This is my first visit to your site and I think I may become a regular customer! I have this same battle (cave-in) with Evie. Christmas was a virtual explosion of pink Hello Kitty (her two favorite things rolled into one- add a star and a bow and it's perfection!). I'm still at a loss to figure out how this happened to MY daughter- I who wear black and have spent most of my adult life shunning pink! But at least it gives me hope that she will be more on the girly side rather than the burly side...
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